United Flight 1849

in Giggles on February 4, 2017

I cannot BELIEVE I went the entire month of January without a single post!!  I am so sorry.  Apparently, the writer’s block that has overtaken my brain does not only apply to my new book–but also to my blog.

Thankfully, last weekend my daughter and I took a little trip to sunny San Diego to visit my sisters.  They seldom fail to provide me with writing material.  My baby sister is pregnant.  I cannot believe I just typed out that sentence.  I vividly remember the night she was born.  I am roughly twelve years older than she is, so when she arrived, I had a real-live baby doll to play with.  It is more than a little surreal to think about my baby having a baby…but…after seeing her in person this past weekend, that is an absolute certainty.

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She is doing all of the things that first-time Mommas do…including, and especially freaking out.  As good as my sister is with kids (she’s been a nanny for several years now) all of that knowledge seems to dissipate when faced with the prospect of having your own.

I have one word for her, and for any other first-timers reading this: RELAX.

Y’all are gonna be just fine.

Don’t worry about the things that have not happened, or the people staring you down in grocery stores for buying powdered sugar donuts or too much granola.  We each have our unique styles of parenting personalized to OUR family.  As my sisters like to say,

They don’t know your life!

So, in reality, the haters can keep moving.  Unless your child is in danger…real, physical danger, it isn’t anyone’s place to tell you what to do.  Now, with that said, I’m not always going to keep my mouth shut—that’s not in my nature!!  But, you, as the parent (and a fellow adult) have to learn either A.) let things roll off of you or B.) take advice from someone who has actually been there.

On my flight home, I heard a young family coming down the aisle.  I heard them before I saw them.  It was a family of three: Mom and Dad, with their approximately one-year-old baby girl in tow.  She was screaming.  Most parents know that there is a huge difference between a crying baby, and a screaming baby.  This one was screaming, and they sat in the aisle behind us.  My heart broke for those parents.  Three hundred people were staring at them, judging them, wondering why they can’t get that baby to be quiet…or so they thought.

I promise you, I would’ve kicked anyone in the shins that said a cross word to those poor parents.  For starters, you simply cannot get a baby to just be quiet.  They have no OFF SWITCH.  Secondly, we have no idea where they came from.  Perhaps San Diego was not their first airport, and that baby was DONE…maybe her sweet-baby-ears never cleared from her last flight, and she was in pain.  You cannot explain pain to an infant.  That baby cried from San Diego to Houston, with about a 30 minute exception.  It is a three-hour-flight.  She was hoarse when we landed.  Her parents needed a drink.  I want to say one thing to her parents:

It’s okay.  Y’all did great.

Patience cannot be explained either; it must be learned.  It’s a hard, hard lesson.

Parenting is not easy.  It is not for sissies, nor for the faint of heart.  It is the most brutal field trip you will ever go on…but it is totally cool.  Kristina, I want you to chill.  Stop taking you weekly baby emails quite so literally…they’re cool, but mostly scary.  You got this.  Babies are manufactured by Rubbermaid.  They are designed to outlast first-time parents…even THIRD-time parents!  Look at my kids!

Take a breath.  Relax.  And enjoy your kids.

Here’s hoping your day is FUN!

-Dallas

Don’t forget to check out my new Facebook page, and for more parenting tips or to book for your Women’s group, contact my publicist.

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